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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 136 · Friday, 13 November 2026

Navy & Marines

Marine with extremely low IQ thrilled by switch to Super Intelligence

Marine Corps announces major technological advancement requiring millions of dollars in new signage and PowerPoint slides

Homeless veterans receive 10% off cardboard boxes this Veterans Day

Hegseth asks staff to make next execution more like ‘The Running Man’

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Vol. 15 · No. 136

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Vol. 15 · No. 136 · Deployed worldwide

Friday

13 November 2026

1658 Zulu

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Veterans · Page 2

Applebee’s waitress diagnosed with PTSD after Veterans Day shift

Thank you for your service.

Filed · 1105

SHILOH, Ill. — A local Applebee’s Neighborhood Bar & Grill waitress has been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after working a shift on Veterans Day, sources confirmed today.

Veteran waitress Kari Robinson reportedly began “breathing heavily and hallucinating before becoming overwhelmed with inconsolable rage” in the middle of lunch service Friday. Robinson’s symptoms coincided with the chain restaurant's Veterans Day offer of free meals to former military service members, which typically results in their franchise locations being overwhelmed by customers wearing camouflage shirts, hats with their former duty station, or military-issue boots.

“It was a fucking warzone,” Robinson said between heaving sobs. “You couldn’t escape them [military veterans]. They were everywhere. Whether it was constantly refilling their black coffee, listening to their stories about ‘being in the suck,’ or trying to corral their children from destroying our restaurant, you couldn’t shake them.”

“I lost so many good plates out there,” she added.

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