CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — Lt. Col. Clark Hardwick says he "profoundly regrets" bringing his 18-year-old daughter Cassidy to the battalion Christmas party, sources confirmed today.

Hardwick, commander of 2nd Battalion, 8th Marines, planned the event as a fun meet-and-greet for Marines' families. But he became worried when his daughter returned from a private barracks tour with egg nog all over her hair and face.

"I know there's some mischief afoot here," said a suspicious Hardwick. "I bet she was off eating milk and cookies with Golf Company when I explicitly told her no sweets."

Hardwick also didn't quite know why dozens of Marines congregated around his daughter and took pictures of her on their phones.