This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Coast Guard recruits Michael Phelps as only rescue swimmer
JUNEAU, Alaska — Michael Phelps, the most decorated Olympian of all time, has finished swimming in the Rio Olympics and moved on to become the Coast Guard’s one and only designated rescue swimmer.
"We snagged Aqua Man," said Chief of Coast Guard Aviation Capt. Ray Carmichael. "So we fired all our current rescue swimmers and hired Poseidon himself."
The 31-year-old swimmer will report to Air Station Kodiak to engage in all swimmer-based rescues. His performances have proved that he can not only handle saving the lives of those in distress at sea, but he also has the sufficient propulsion to make it to the next distress call.
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Hegseth mistakes getting older for declining military standards
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Duffel Blog’s Top 13 ideas for solving the Iran War
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Americans begin thanking troops for future service
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Pentagon limits combat casualties to normal business hours
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DoD reclassifies sexual assault as 'flirting' under new policy
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Fat Leonard releases sex tape as part of presidential pardon campaign
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