FORT BENNING, Ga. – Army 2nd Lt. Kevin Dingleberg has resting dumb face, a source familiar with the matter told reporters.
“We’d prefer the term ‘resting confused face’ or ‘resting bewildered’ face," said company equal opportunity representative Staff Sgt. Dave Muth. “But we all can agree that Dingleberg has the stupidest fucking face we’ve seen.”
Dingleberg, a recent distinguished military graduate of the ROTC program at the University of Nebraska, has been blissfully unaware that any time he stops focusing on his command presence, his face looks like a freeze frame of someone getting hit in the face with a dildo.
