This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Marine commandant realizes this is just how it’s going to be now
Commandant confirms it’s not temporary dysfunction—it’s the mission.
ARLINGTON, Va — U.S. Marine Commandant Gen. Eric Smith has come to the horrifying realization that it’s just going to keep being like this for a few years, sources confirmed today.
“I was checking if my phone was tapped when I realized this isn’t the growing pains of a new administration,” Smith said to reporters at the Pentagon. “We have to accept this is the new normal. The Secretary of Defense thinks he’s competent and doing a good job. There is no congressional inquiry, news story, or scandal that will make him question his decisions. It’s not an act either. He’s just that dumb.”
“And even if he gets fired, he was the best person Trump could find,” Smith added. “Imagine the second best.”
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Staff command works hard to accomplish nothing
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Pentagon unveils ‘Send Someone Else’ campaign for Iran war supporters
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Trump strikes deal to buy precision missiles from North Korea
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Air Force IG uncovers SNACKOs taking kickbacks from Big Insulin
R.J. Williams
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Pentagon facing dangerous shortage of fucks given
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