The following is an opinion article written by your girlfriend.

The new Army Physical Training Uniform is slowly rolling out across American military posts and bedroom floors. And I have to say, I’m disappointed at the wasted opportunity. They fit poorly, the colors aren’t stylish, and they might be warm during a five-mile formation run, but they aren’t that warm when I’m walking across campus to get a latte before class. Basically, they’re a trophy no one wants.

America’s girlfriends need softer, fleecier, more stealable PTs. Maybe something from North Face?

The old, gray army shirt had kind of an Urban Outfitters thing going on, but the new one makes me feel like a bumblebee. Not even a sexy bumblebee like last year at Halloween. Joint Chiefs, I’m rolling my eyes at you right now. The less than 1% of Americans who are banging the troops deserve better.