Sergeant Major Petulantly Orders West Point Grad To Use More Big Words
FORT BLISS, TX – Sgt. Maj. Michael Arnez made waves today at the local German club after sources reported overhearing the 23-year Army veteran yelling at a freshly-commissioned second lieutenant to “use more big words.”
“With all due veneration sir,” the sergeant major was recounted as explaining to petrified junior officer 2nd Lt. Marius Valjean, “I comprehend that you attended West Point, a respected institution of erudite higher learning if ever there was one, but you are not discoursing in a fashion that befits a gentleman of your class and rank."
Arnez went on to tell the officer that he had reduced his past participle and used improper grammar in a dissertation with a comrade. "‘Where were you at last night’ is simply an inappropriate clause to be spouted from the lips of an officer," he said.
2nd Lt. Valjean, who received a baccalaureate degree in English from the United States Military Academy this past June — making him the only employed person in America with such a degree — wa…
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Duffel Blog to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.