ATLANTA, GA — Prior-military paintball team "28th Paintfantry" has yet to win a single match against area teenagers according to sources at the paintball arena.

The team has cited many reasons, including a lack of viable air support and poor intelligence.

“Combat is all I know,” admitted retired Spc. Justin Rome, a former Army supply assistant. “The enemy just doesn’t realize that the way they’re winning is all wrong.”

Rome, the team’s captain, recounted the most recent loss as he removed his Afghan scarf and dusted off his 5.11 tactical pants. “We were pinned down by withering enemy fire, and we asked ourselves what the professional warriors overseas would do. Instinctively, I grabbed my MBITR radio and called for air support, but they never showed."

"We lost a lot of good men that day," he said, looking away. "Half our team quit paintball and do AirSoft now.”

Mohamed Abdulah, the young leader of the Inner-City Integrated Sports team, or ICIS, believes the 28th Paintfantry warriors simply…