Honestly? This is overkill.
QUANTICO, VA — A groundbreaking study conducted by Marine Corps Systems Command has revealed that 87% of Marine privates could potentially be replaced by Roombas, the popular robotic vacuum cleaners.
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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday
Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Thursday, 22 October 2026
Pentagon
Hegseth consults God via dumpster fire behind Pentagon
Secretary says God commanded him to invade Greenland, restore Christian values
US to livestream execution of Ukraine
Iran condemns US plan to livestream execution as barbaric
Vol. 15 · No. 126
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Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Deployed worldwide
Thursday
22 October 2026
0945 Zulu
Next edition Friday
Can a Roomba beat a final boss or drink 7 Four Lokos in 14 minutes?
Filed · 0720
Honestly? This is overkill.
QUANTICO, VA — A groundbreaking study conducted by Marine Corps Systems Command has revealed that 87% of Marine privates could potentially be replaced by Roombas, the popular robotic vacuum cleaners.
Pentagon
Secretary says God commanded him to invade Greenland, restore Christian values
Pentagon
White House promises largest pay-per-view military event in history
OpFor
Tehran questions whether America has completely abandoned standards of human decency
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