MINNEAPOLIS, Minn. — Minnesota National Guard units mobilized in response to ongoing protests report the situation on the ground is “Serious, dangerous, and just downright uncivilized.”

“Oh yah, hey,” Captain Lina Linasdotterson said to reporters earlier today. “Is it crazy out there? You betcha. However we’re doing our best to reduce violence, stop looting, and provide safe places for all our residents to donate to NPR. We have instituted a curfew, but that’s been ineffective. There's no hockey to watch if they go home.”