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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 120 · Thursday, 8 October 2026

Pentagon

DTS works properly after hack by rogue AI

Pentagon scrambling to restore slow load times, incomprehensible errors and traditional user experience

Lincoln sailor returning from deployment already broke

Paste-eating Marine praised for unmatched commitment to unit

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Vol. 15 · No. 120

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Vol. 15 · No. 120 · Deployed worldwide

Thursday

8 October 2026

1252 Zulu

Next edition Friday

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Veterans · Page 2

Trump criticized for 'sneaking in a quick nine' at Arlington national cemetery

“Where’s McCain?” Trump asked. “I want to make a chip shot off his headstone.”

Filed · 0501

ARLINGTON, Va. — Uproar over former president Donald Trump’s recent campaign stop at Arlington National Cemetery has escalated following reports that he was seen “sneaking in a quick nine holes” of golf on the hallowed cemetery grounds.

“This place is beautiful,” Trump declared for campaign cameramen as he jammed a tee into the soft earth of the plot of one of America’s honored dead and placed his golf ball on it.

“Arkham Cemetery is where we come to remember American heroes, like those we lost in Afghanistan, and me after winning the last Trump golf tournament. We’re truly amazing,” Trump said. He then swung his club, and the ball lurched forward, sliced to the right, and impacted the headstone of a Medal of Honor recipient.

“He should have gotten the much better Presidential Medal of Freedom,” quipped Trump solemnly. The president later took a mulligan after his ball hit a caisson horse during a funeral ceremony, according to campaign officials.

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