WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump is calling for the unorthodox activation of January 6th veterans to augment the recent extension of a National Guard troops deployed in the nation’s capital, White House sources confirmed late last night.
The president’s latest domestic show of militarized force follows closely on the heels of his August 11th directive to activate the National Guard in Washington under Title 32. Recall of the strike force colloquially known as the “January Sixers" appears to fall under the authority of yet another executive order in Trump’s record-setting spree of unilateral actions.
“This man can clearly do whatever the fuck he wants,” asserted White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt, “and there’s not really anything you or I can do to stop him.”
According to staff on duty, Trump bellowed “J6!” and bolted for the White House rooftop, marking the 79-year-old’s second visit in recent months to the historical landmark’s more elevated scenes, much to the dismay of his security detail.
“I heard [Trump] scream ‘J6!’ at the top of his lungs and I assumed someone at WHCA [White House Communications Agency] cut off his Internet at his bedtime again,” Secret Service Agent Chad Pyfrom recollected.
“Then, when he ran past me and scurried up to the roof, I realized he was talking about that ‘J6,’” Pyfrom continued.
