This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
US Navy SEAL actually just ‘really tactical’ gunner’s mate
USS NEW ORLEANS (LPD-18) – Sources confirmed today that Petty Officer Third Class Rob Shakely, thought to be a Navy SEAL, is actually just an ordinary Gunner’s Mate. Shakely, a veteran of one and a half years, claims to have done nothing to perpetuate the misconception that he is a maritime commando.
“Honestly, I have no idea where people get the idea that I’m a Navy SEAL,” Shakely says, posing with a clear and safe M4 at a clearing barrel. “Seriously, like, I haven’t even been to BUD/S,” he grunts while churning out a set of pushups for the camera.
“Wait, he’s not a SEAL?” shrieks a female just within earshot. “You mean I [expletive deleted] him for no reason?”
More Stories
Pentagon facing dangerous shortage of fucks given
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Opinion: Listen up, assholes. Turn in your excess cruise missiles or everybody stays in formation
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Army Reserve adopts 'Nothing we do today is more important than lunch' as new recruiting slogan
SECDEF_Nice
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Hegseth mistakes getting older for declining military standards
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Duffel Blog’s Top 13 ideas for solving the Iran War
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Americans begin thanking troops for future service
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