9 badass quotes Mattis should have left out of his wedding vows
Congrats to Mr. & Mrs. Chaos
By Cat Astronaut
In a career spanning over five decades, Marine Corps legend and former Secretary of Defense James Mattis was known for his complete dedication to duty and the shunning of a personal life. Now, all that has changed: the “warrior monk” recently tied the knot, launching a new chapter in his warfighting career.
But will a lifetime of leading Marines on the front lines translate into successful command and control of this holy matrimony?
Mattis admits that marriage will be a “combined arms” effort the scope of which he has never seen and that his years of combat experience might not translate directly into marital matters. Indeed, below are some classic Mattis quotes that we love, but that he nevertheless should not have included in his wedding vows.
“I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes, if you fuck with me, I’ll kill you all.” This line certainly set the tone following the invasion of Iraq, when Mattis had to make it clear to Iraqi leaders that his Marines would be firm but fair. The tone it set when he opened his wedding vows with it, however, was a different matter.
“There are some assholes in the world that just need to be shot.” So true. But not necessarily something that needs to be reiterated when stating one’s intent to cherish one’s love for eternity.
“If you haven’t read hundreds of books…you are functionally illiterate.” It’s hard to tell if this was Mattis’s subtle way of encouraging his new wife to read more, or if he was just reminding the gathering of friends and family about the minimum standards for functional literacy.
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