By Zoltar the Malignant

PORTSMOUTH, Va. — The ongoing controversy over how the Navy chooses names for its ships intensified this week following the launch of the USS Your Mother’s a Whore.

The lead vessel of the Navy’s new class of supply ships was christened at Norfolk Naval Shipyard next to her sister ship, the USS Your Father Backs Up Into Doorknobs, which is expected to put to sea later this year. She will rendezvous for her shakedown cruise with the littoral combat ship USS Gabrielle Giffords.

Duffel Blog

USS Gabrielle Giffords Christened As Navy's First Gun-Free Warship

MOBILE, Ala. — Seeking to honor a retired congresswoman and 2011 shooting victim in the most considerate and respectful way possible, the Navy today christened the future USS Gabrielle Giffords (LCS-10), a first-of-its-kind, gun-free warship. Designed to hold a core crew of 40 sailors, the Independence-class littoral combat ship has been stripped bare of its Mk 110 57-millimeter gun, all four of its Mk2 .50-cal machine guns, its Evolved SeaRAM 11 cell missile launcher, and its entire cache of small arms, which are typically issued to boarding teams and watch standers…

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7 years ago · Ted Heller

The Navy has drawn controversy in recent years for naming ships after Giffords, a mass shooting victim turned gun control advocate, gay rights pioneer Harvey Milk, and civil rights activist Cesar Chavez, who called his Navy service “the worst two years of his life.” Further outrage was averted late last year when plans for the USS Alex Jones were scrapped on the secret orders of the Trilateral Commission, the Illuminati, and the Council on Foreign Relations.

Still, the new vessels join the flee…