This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
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Marine Corps
Marines: solving every problem with either a knife hand or C4.
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Space Marine: Oh, you think my job is cool? Try police calling in zero gravity
The following is a transcription of an unauthorized audio file embedded in a command chronology burst sent via retrans comm drone. The file was
Oct 5, 2022 · 4 min read
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177 stories in this section
Mattis named CEO of 'soldiers without borders' non-profit
JAKARTA — Retired U.S. Marine Gen. James Mattis was named CEO of the non-profit "Soldiers Without Borders" in a small press conference at the Windsor
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarine Corps cancels helicopter crash trainer and just crashes real helicopters in gulf of Aden
USS MESA VERDE — All 25 Marines and Sailors who went through the Marine Corps first and most realistic helicopter crash simulation in the Gulf of Aden passed through
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min read
You're getting out of the Marine Corps? are you insane?
The following is an op-ed written by your company first sergeant. Hey Marine, come on in and take a seat. Can I get you anything? No? Ok
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min read
The top 10 candidates for the next Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps
As the Marine Corps prepares to select a new Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps, Duffel Blog has found several of the strongest contenders. This list is provided
Oct 5, 2022 · 3 min read
2014 unintelligible staff NCO of the year award announced
WASHINGTON, D.C. — "What?" With this one ironically clear word, the 148th United States Unintelligible Staff Non-Commissioned Officer of the Year (USOTY) Competition effectively came
Oct 5, 2022 · 4 min readMarine Corps gazette discontinues controversial swimsuit issue
QUANTICO, Va. — In the face of mounting criticism, the Marine Corps Association has decided to no longer publish its annual Marine Corps Gazette Swimsuit Issue, ending a nearly
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarine Corps announces plan to develop, cancel new amphibious vehicle
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Marine Corps announced its plan to spend billions of dollars to research, develop, and build a new amphibious vehicle that will be canceled just
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min readU.S. Creates world's largest Marine preserve in pacific
HONOLULU, HI – President Obama has signed an order creating the world's largest Marine preserve in the Pacific Ocean, a move the president has said will further
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min read
Marine one crew wishes president would shut the fuck up already
WASHINGTON — Both Marine One pilots waiting on the White House South Lawn wish the President would shut the f--k up and get on the goddamn aircraft so
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min read
Marine Corps spiritual reawakening inadvertently causes zombie apocalypse
QUANTICO, Va. — In a misguided attempt to awaken the warrior spirit of the Corps, a seance conducted by senior officers at Henderson Hall went awry when thousands of
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min read
Punxsutawney Phil predicts at least ten more years of war
PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. – Senior defense and intelligence officials confirmed today that groundhog and famous prognosticator Punxsutawney Phil had predicted another 10 years of armed conflict for the United States,
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min read
GNC to release pre-workout dip
SAN DIEGO, Calif. – Sports nutrition giant GNC plans to release a new pre-workout smokeless tobacco product some time in 2015, Duffel Blog has learned. The experimental energy/
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarine Corps creates new MOS for recruiting posters: 4311 model, basic Marine
THE PENTAGON — Headquarters Marine Corps has announced the creation a new military occupational specialty which will enhance the Division of Public Affairs' ability to communicate the mission
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readCO: Soldiers will wear Marine Corps uniforms to improve morale
FORT CARSON, Colo. — In an effort to improve morale within his unit, Army Col. David Hodne has ordered his soldiers to eschew wearing traditional Army uniforms laden with
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min readHOMELESS: Volcano dragon from 1998 Marine Corps ad living in van on skid row
Gunnery Sgts. Victor Rodriguez and Kevin O'Donnell had gotten lost on South San Pedro Street looking for parking near Sam's Hofbrau Strip Club when
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min read
Marine ‘emotionally exhausted’ by having to plan to kill everyone he meets
He takes Gen. Mattis' orders very seriously.
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarines issue policy for off-duty personnel to cover heads with bags
QUANTICO, Va. — Following a terrible mass-shooting at a Marine Reserve Center last Thursday, the Marine Corps has vowed to take swift protective measures including a policy that
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min read
New regulation to prohibit Marines from inviting celebrities to Marine Corps ball
WASHINGTON, DC – Facing what he called an "epidemic" of Marines posting videos asking out celebrities to this year's Marine Corps ball, the Corps'
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarine Corps band NJP'd for playing 'Baby It's Cold Outside'
WASHINGTON — The U.S. Marine Corps Band was NJP'd last night midway through a holiday concert held at the Pentagon, after performing "Baby, It'
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readREVIEW: 'Jarhead 3: Benghazi' is a powerful character study of Marine Todd
Director William Kaufman follows up his smash hit The Marine 4: Moving Target with Jarhead 3: Benghazi, a testosterone fueled, action packed thrill ride, and a powerful study
Oct 5, 2022 · 2 min readMarine Corps' new titles remove 'man' from infantryman, other jobs
THE PENTAGON — In the wake of a sweeping review of military occupational specialties (MOS), the Marine Corps has revealed new gender inclusive titles, as ground combat and other
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min readSemperFuxit: Marine Corps votes to exit Dept. Of the Navy
QUANTICO, Va. — In a move military analysts call “simply stunning,” the Marine Corps voted in a referendum Friday to leave the Department of the Navy, forming a separate
Oct 5, 2022 · 1 min read
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