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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 117 · Wednesday, 30 September 2026

Army

Backed-up toilet appointed new Secretary of the Army

Pentagon says clogged fixture brings “continuity, stability and ability to swallow enormous amounts of shit”

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

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Vol. 15 · No. 117

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Vol. 15 · No. 117 · Deployed worldwide

Wednesday

30 September 2026

1749 Zulu

Next edition Friday

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· Page 2

Method actor prepared for Bin Laden role by founding Al Qaeda cell, blowing up bus station

Filed · 1545

LONDON, UK – January's academy award nominations included many surprises, though none bigger than the out-of-left-field nomination for Best Supporting Actor. Ricky Sekhon was nominated for his work playing wanted terrorist Osama bin Laden in the movie Zero Dark Thirty.

While other actors, such as Daniel Day Lewis and Shia Labeouf, are well known for their extreme method acting, novice Sekhon took it to a new level: getting in touch with his inner-terrorist by founding an active al Qaeda cell and blowing up a bus station in Pakistan.

"In hindsight it was a stroke of genius," Sekhon told Duffel Blog from his cell in Guantanamo Bay. "So many terrorists you see on camera are one-dimensional cardboard cutouts, and I just didn't want that to be me."

Ironically Sekhon, a 29-year-old Sikh, said he knew almost nothing about radical Islam or terrorism before taking his role. "The casting call just said 'Six foot plus, swarthy complexion, bearded. Individuals frequently stopped at airports will receive preference.'"

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