FORT BENNING, GA — In the tragic wake of an Army recruit being hooahed to death by his Drill Sergeants last week, top leadership is trying to find a solution that will end senseless hooah-related tragedies and also maintain motivation across the force.

Much to the dismay of activists, the commander of the Army's basic training program has now declared all training areas hooah-free zones. "I will use my powers to the best of my ability to ensure that no soldier must ever endure the pain of hooah suffering," said Col. Richard Avery.

"Outlawing hooah only stops regulation-conscious soldiers from hooah-ing," said Specialist Frank Alvarado. "The drill sergeants don't respect anti-hooah regulations and they'll continue to say it anyway. I mean, that's 70% of their vocabulary right there."

That sentiment is echoed by Sgt. Maj. Alan Greenberg, who also chairs the National Hooah Association.