Atheist Lieutenant Annoys Entire Platoon Into Christianity
FORT SILL, Okla. — An Army platoon leader was shocked to learn that his entire platoon had converted to Christianity en masse this week, despite his condescending and lengthy talks about his own lack of belief in God.
“I just can’t understand it,” said 1st Lt. Edward Garrison from his office, still dazed at hearing the news. “I mean, you figure there will be one or two kids who are always the, you know, the smallminded, the kids who are too afraid to be moral on their own. But my whole platoon? And after I spent so much time encouraging them to be free thinkers and humanists?
"This is just too much," he added, before departing early for the day, telling his commander he felt ill.
Garrison’s soldiers claim that rather than dissuade them, his militant atheism actually drove them toward religion.
“I grew up Catholic,” said Sgt. 1st Class Eric Hernandez, the platoon sergeant, who noted that he fell away from religion later in life. "But with the lieutenant always throwing it in my face, sayin…
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Duffel Blog to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.