ARABIAN GULF – More than one-third of the USS Eisenhower's crew has requested paternity leave, following the Navy's announcement that one of its sailors gave birth to a healthy seven-pound baby girl while underway aboard the aircraft carrier, sources confirmed.

In what was an originally exciting, if not unexpected situation, the Eisenhower’s administration department has become “flooded with a deluge of paternity leave requests,” said Master Chief Yeoman Reginald "Reggie" Frank.

“It’s an admin nightmare, but I can’t blame these guys. The mother and baby were airlifted to Bahrain, so hell, that means two weeks shore leave in Manama, whether or not she’s actually your baby-mama,” Frank added.