Nation shocked to learn top spy agency spies on people
WASHINGTON — The nation is in a panic after discovering that the Central Intelligence Agency — also known as the "CIA" according to recently-declassified documents — may be spying on people around the world.
The revelation comes alongside a stunning collection of leaked documents by WikiLeaks, Russia's top news agency, which released a staggering 8,761 classified documents last week in a collection mysteriously known as "Vault 7."
Dwarfed only by the size of Congress' new healthcare bill, the collection of documents contained droves of material detailing the CIA's spy programs, including a comprehensive list of emojis that can be made using a standard computer keyboard — keyboards which may also be hackable by the Agency.
Among other shocking discoveries from Vault 7 include ideas that smartphones, which govern and take input from nearly every facet of American's lives, could potentially be used by either the CIA or 13-year-olds to gather information about users in ways other than clicki…
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