THE PENTAGON — Army Chief of Staff Mark Milley is mandating SHARP training for the Pentagon Press Corps after their heavy coverage of newly-confirmed Army Secretary Eric Fanning's sexual orientation this week.
"Is it not 2016, or did I pound too much vodka with the Russkies last night?" Milley asked a group of reporters. "Grow the fuck up. Besides, let me stress that a gay man will understand the infantry and cav-scout communities better than anyone else in the world."
Pentagon spokesman Peter Cook backed up Milley by wheeling out a cart of past op-eds and news articles attacking the Army for intolerance and immaturity toward different sexual orientations.
