Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
20,000+readers briefed

First female Army Ranger brags about her veiny, seven-Inch clitoris

First female Army Ranger brags about her veiny, seven-Inch clitoris

FORT BENNING — The first woman in history to graduate from Army Ranger School, arguably the most grueling, toughest training in the U.S. military, and thus the world, has just pinned on her Ranger tab — and she is letting the world know how proud she is of her very large clitoris.

1st Lt. Penny O’Keefe, who was also one of the first females to pass the Army’s Infantry basic training course, told a group of reporters assembled to witness her historic graduation all about her genitalia.

“Glass ceilings and good-ole-boys beware,” O’Keefe said, smiling broadly. “You might be used to Rangers having big swinging dicks. But this Ranger,” she said, pointing to herself, “has a clitoris. A veiny, throbbing, seven-and-one-quarter inch clitoris.”

“Plus, it leaks a white fluid when she gets excited,” said her boyfriend, Navy SEAL Bleys Pasquale, running a hand through his exquisitely-gelled hair. “It’s hot,” he added, squeezing O’Keefe playfully.

More Stories

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal
WELCOME10 — 10% off applied at checkout

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!