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Major pokes head out of meeting, predicts 6 more hours of useless slides

PENTAGAWNEY, Va. — In a celebrated local tradition, Maj. Bill O'Connor poked his head out of a staff meeting today to predict whether or not it would end early, eventually declaring the meeting would continue for at least another six hours after he saw a shadow of his former self in the hallway mirror, sources say.

The event has become a daily custom in O'Connor's office. Nearly every day, coworkers from around the building gather outside the conference room with coffee and donuts to await his forecast.

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