Warrior souls searching Valhalla for missing hammer

ASGARD—Valhalla has been on lockdown for the past millennium, as warrior souls have been searching for the missing hammer of Thor, according to Valkyries close to the situation.

"We narrowed down the possible location to a few billion cubic light years of empty space," said Egil, legendary hero and brother of Wayland the Smith. "However, until it is foun…