Skip to content
America's Most-Trusted Military News
Breaking
Loading headlines...

Justin Timberlake gives your weekend safety brief

Guess who’s going to have to pick your nasty ass up from jail when you step out of line. It’s gonna be me.

| 2 min read
Justin Timberlake gives your weekend safety brief

FORT DRUM, N.Y. — Listen up, Fam! We don’t have long and I have a lot to do before my world tour, I mean liberty! 

We are coming up on the weekend and as we all know, a lot can happen. Before I say “Bye, Bye, Bye” to all of you chuckleheads, we have to go over some common sense safety tips. Starting off with an oldy but a goodie: Don’t subtract from the population or add to the population. If you aren’t ready to be a mom or dad, you know what to do

Second, keep your hands to yourselves! I know it’s tough. Sometimes you find yourself just so caught up while performing at the Pepsi Super Bowl Halftime Show but trust me, it’s not worth it. To be clear though, if you assault or manhandle a woman, she will get in trouble and you will probably be totally fine, with zero impact on your career. It’s not a great look, though. 

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Shipping & taxes calculated at checkout.