SAN ANTONIO, Texas — In response to rising border tensions, President Donald Trump has ordered the National Guard and some active duty units to defend the Alamo against the incoming migrant caravan.
“There is no way we are letting the Mexicans win this time,” said Trump of his 15,000-man force crammed into the five acre historic site 300 miles from the border.
The administration conceded that the centuries-old mission walls wouldn’t provide the ideal defense against the procession of bad hombres, but that it would “just have to do” until the great wall is erected.
“I thought it would be bigger,” the president allegedly whispered to Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, Gen. Joseph Dunford, upon visiting the fort.
