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PRIDE LANDS, Africa — General David M. Rodriguez, commander of US Africa Command (AFRICOM), died yesterday afternoon, trampled to death in a freak wildebeest stampede, Duffel Blog has learned. “It’s
KOBANI, Syria — Hector Bazinet, a Belgian citizen and self-described "gaming fanatic" who left home to join the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) earlier this
BORNO, Nigeria — According to insider reports obtained by Duffel Blog, leaders for the terrorist group Boko Haram have called an emergency meeting to determine how many more murders, rapes and
Quantico, Va. — Marine Cpl. Willie Dix was relieved of his duties as a combat artist by the National Museum of the Marine Corps last week after he returned from Afghanistan
GLENDALE, Ariz. — Brewers across the country will be pulling out all the stops to “give back” to veterans this weekend, according to NFL sources. Budweiser has announced 6 different, 30-
FLINT, Mich. — Veterans are threatening violence and murder over a satirical cartoon of American Sniper author Chris Kyle drawn by film director Michael Moore, according to chatter on veteran message
FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. — Col. Robert Root has found overwhelming evidence to support his latest Officer Professional Development brief on the topic of confirmation bias, sources confirmed Tuesday. Root is preparing
FORT DRUM, N.Y. — Capt. Tyler Peters, the commander of Bravo Company, 1-87 Infantry, charged Staff Sgt. John Shuller on Wednesday with being drunk on duty after the soldier
WASHINGTON — Both Marine One pilots waiting on the White House South Lawn wish the President would shut the f--k up and get on the goddamn aircraft so they can
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSI6-LF_l9A MOSUL, Iraq – Sources confirmed American citizen Rick Phelps was beheaded today in Iraq after footage was disseminated to various media outlets
LA GRANGE, Texas — Beloved Rock and Roll Hall of Fame artist ZZ Top has retained the services of Jimmy, Jojo, Kim, and Keith LLP to seek unspecified damages from the
FORT BENNING, Ga. – An Army base in Georgia was placed on Threat Condition (THREATCON) Delta today, the highest force protection measures in the Department of Defense, after a military serviceman
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Obama failed to acknowledge an American flag prominently displayed on a veteran’s pickup truck on Wednesday, further incensing a majority of Americans not born in
BAGRAM AIRFIELD — Capt. Martin Lewis, an MQ-1 Predator drone pilot in the U.S. Air Force, has raised enough money through the Kickstarter website to bring his military working
QUANTICO, Va. — In a misguided attempt to awaken the warrior spirit of the Corps, a seance conducted by senior officers at Henderson Hall went awry when thousands of fallen Marines
NAHA, Okinawa Prefecture — Hailed as yet another landmark consular victory between the United States and Japan, Gov. Hirokazu Nakaima signed legislation today moving Marine Corps Air Station (MCAS) Futenma to
PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. – Senior defense and intelligence officials confirmed today that groundhog and famous prognosticator Punxsutawney Phil had predicted another 10 years of armed conflict for the United States, setting the
USS CURTIS WILBUR — Sailors aboard USS Curtis Wilbur (DDG-54) are reacting in shock after learning that a crewmember has recently qualified to stand watch on one of the vessel’
WASHINGTON — New Sgt. Maj. of the Army Daniel A. Dailey has moved quickly to establish himself, publishing what sources call "an objective and balanced" policy letter prohibiting the
NAVAL AIR STATION LEMOORE— Having amassed a list of accomplishments described by her superiors as "truly impeccable," a Naval Hospital Lemoore Sailor with eight years of service under
CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — A field grade officer in the Marine Corps who needlessly sent 44 men to their deaths is apparently "dumbfounded" at how the Seattle Seahawks
THE PENTAGON — After coming under fire from offended social media users for tweeting about "chinks" in its spec ops' digital and physical armor, the Army recently released
Sgt. Maj. Daniel A. Daily took his oath of office Jan. 31, becoming the youngest, hottest, Sgt. Maj. of the Army since the position was created in 1966. Every Chain-
NEW YORK — NBC news anchor Brian Williams has publicly dropped his claim that he was personally beheaded by al Qaeda in Iraq, saying he had misremembered the event. Williams — known
FAYETTEVILLE, N.C. — Army Spouse Lindsey Ackerman would like everyone to know that she deserves a measure of sympathy for the physical damage that her impending divorce has caused her,
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