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’MURICA – The professional coalition of rough-and-ready patriots known as The Proud Boys arrived in formation at 0330 this morning, sources report, ready to execute follow-on presidential directives.
“Alright, gents, POTUS wants us to standby,” tweeted Proud Boys leader, Enrique Tarrio. “I want every swinging dick on a 24-hour recall.”
The Proud Boys, founded in 2016, were established as an everyman check to uphold the Constitutionality of orders emanating from the Oval Office.
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