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Opinion: War with Iran distracts from coming war against lizard people

Former military intelligence officer says Americans are ignoring the real threat hiding inside HOA boards, O-5 billets, and possibly Taylor Swift

Opinion: War with Iran distracts from coming war against lizard people
Photo taken by one of our brave soldiers wearing “special glasses” that reveal the true form of this lizard person.

The following is an opinion piece by former Army Capt. Jenson Briggs.

As a former military intelligence officer. I can tell with confidence that we are focusing on the wrong war.

Sure, Iran is important. Everyone in the military knows that Iran was responsible for many American casualties in Iraq and Syria. But while everyone is glued to maps of the Strait of Hormuz, they are missing the larger truth.

The truth is that we need to prepare for the coming global conflict with the lizard people.

And before anyone jumps in with, “Actually, they’re not ‘lizards’ or ‘people,’” let me stop you there. I am fully tracking that. I know the “lizard people" claim to be a fungus-derived parasitic intelligence that previously hijacked reptilian hosts on another planet.

I am still calling them lizard people. 

Because frankly, I don't see any difference between the old reptile bodies and the new ones they're currently piloting inside the Bush family, the Trump family, the Rothschilds, and possibly Taylor Swift.

They need to be sent back home to the Draco or Orion constellations or at a minimum, New Jersey.

Former Army Capt. Jenson Briggs reviews intelligence materials related to what he describes as the coming “global conflict with the lizard people” from an undisclosed location. (Author photo)

Now, I didn’t come to this conclusion lightly. I spent more than a decade in the military. I’ve sat through enough staff meetings, briefings, and command updates to tell you with absolute certainty that roughly 45% of all lieutenant colonels are lizard people.

At least another 30 percent are almost indistinguishable from simple cold-blooded reptilians. 

It's extremely difficult to make it to O-5 without developing some form of fungal brain infection. I don’t know when it happens — probably somewhere between Intermediate Level Education and their second divorce — but it happens.

Most generals, however, appear to remain human. You do not reach flag rank without at least the ability to simulate empathy and basic social interaction.

You can see it in the eyes. The slow nodding. The detached way they talk about “strategic shaping operations,” like they are seconds away from falling asleep during a family readiness briefing.

And we’re supposed to believe these individuals — many of whom openly describe humanity as a critical “resource” — are acting in our best interests?

That’s the same logic we’ve heard for decades: trickle-down economics, deregulation, loosening worker protections, and tax incentives for companies manufacturing what they insist are “heat lamps.”

“We’re helping you,” they say, while quietly optimizing the planet for whatever fungus-lizard hybrids consider a favorable quarterly return.

Wake up!

While Americans argue over whether a war with Iran will last two weeks or should just be declared won, the Reptilian Overmind Collective — or whatever branding they are using this quarter — continues consolidating power over governments, economies, HOA boards, and base mayor cells.

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