Santa denies allegations of toxic eggnog in elf housing

Someone is on the naughty list.

Dec 24, 2021

∙ Paid

By Blondes Over Baghdad

JOINT BASE NORTH POLE — North Pole Garrison commander Santa Claus has denied allegations that the eggnog in elf housing contains toxic levels of contaminates.

Elves traditionally bathe, do dishes, and wash their tights and smocks in the public egg nog supply in elf housing. For many elves, the contaminated eggnog has forced them to…

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