AFGHANISTAN — Deep in the most remote regions of Afghanistan, loyal San Francisco 49er fans serving in a Recon platoon are eagerly awaiting news of their beloved football team, and speculating on how satisfying it will be to beat the "Sheattle Cheathawks" in their own domain.
Lance Cpl. Richard Gutierrez, a San Francisco native now stationed at Camp Pendleton, considers himself an expert in all things NFL.
"It's gonna be a tough match, for sure," Gutierrez said as he ripped open his pizza MRE. "But the Niners have won all their away games in the playoffs and have better game stats in the latter half of the season. Even with the unfair advantage of having better fans and those bullshit top-seed home game rules, Kap can easily drive it home for us."
Gutierrez and his fellow Marines from 1st Reconnaissance Battalion, who haven't received any news from the states in more than two weeks, are in near-unanimous agreement that San Francisco will take the NFC Championship game and go on to play in Superbowl XLVIII. There are, however, disagreements on who the Niners will play on Sunday.
