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Americans wondering if we can just get WW3 over with already

Stop talkin' and start doin'

| 2 min read
Americans wondering if we can just get WW3 over with already

EVERYWHERE, USA— On Jan. 28, 2024, three US soldiers were tragically killed in a drone attack in Jordan, orchestrated and carried out by an Iranian militia group. US forces responded on February 2, striking 85 targets affiliated with the Iranian Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps’ Quds Force. With those exchanges followed by Israel’s April 1 strike on the Iranian Embassy in Damascus and an Iranian cruise missile and drone attack against Israel on April 13, international peace advocate Russia is urging restraint while Americans are asking one really important question:

Are we going to make WW3 a thing or not?

It’s hard to say. Many Americans have been holding their collective breath for over four years due to what seems like a never-ending number of events that remind US citizens of things that rhyme with “Starch Luke Werdidand”, “Girl Barber”, and “Tinvasion of Bow-land”.  

While it feels like decades ago, it was only 2020 when General Qasem Soleimani went from present to past tense on Wikipedia. Then the president totally accused China of creating and weaponizing the COVID-19 virus. China also elected a guy for life and then set their sites on a funky little island that we are only sometimes allowed to call a country. For a while there, many service members actually thought there was a real chance of another land war in Europe. However, the current president, the Congress, and Americans generally have moved on from that minor squabble

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