WASHINGTON, D.C. — The National Park Service has announced the selection of a design called The Eternal Flaming Wheelbarrow Of Cash as a memorial to honor veterans who served in the Global War on Terror, sources confirmed today.
“Our veterans deserve a memorial that accurately captures the spirit of their war,” said Park Service spokesman Tim Taylor. “And I think we’ve really nailed it with this design.”
The approved design will incorporate elements of other famous memorials, most notably a gas-powered eternal flame similar to one at President John F. Kennedy’s grave, in nearby Arlington National Cemetery. However, the GWOT memorial’s eternal flame will burn piles of real U.S. currency to reflect the enormous expense of waging war against an abstract concept, and visiting dignitaries, instead of laying a wreath at the site, will be instructed to honor GWOT veterans by ceremoniously shoveling stacks of cash into the flames, officials said.
The tire of the wheelbarrow will be deflated, to reflect the American experience of becoming mired in an impossible position with no exit strategy or means of withdrawal. One handle of the wheelbarrow will be broken, to symbolize how unwieldy the campaign has been for the military leadership tasked with directing the war effort.
