Donald Trump forced to move to barracks following NJP
"Only I can survive the ninja punch," says former reality star
President Trump arrives at Camp David for non-judicial punishment
CAMP DAVID, Catoctin, Md. — In a negotiated agreement, after lawyers asked for an indefinite delay of proceedings against him the former President, Commander-in-Chief, and presumed 2024 Republican nominee, the legal woes of Donald Trump came to an unexpected end today. On the advice of noted legal expert and not-at-all-crazy person Rudy Giuliani, Trump accepted non-judicial punishment from Marine Capt. Dylan Waddle.
As counseled by 1st Sgt. Archie Henderson, Trump stood at parade rest with his eyes focused on the wall two feet above Waddle’s head as the Commanding Officer of Marine Security Company-Camp David sentenced the former commander-in-chief to the absolute maximum punishment available at company level NJP — 14 days barracks restriction, 14 days of extra duty, and forfeiture of 7 days pay. Trump will spend two weeks checking in with the Sergeant of the Guard hourly, trimming hedges, and painting parking blocks. The…
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