QUANTICO, Va. — Lance Cpl. Will Smithers will be removed from the Marine Corps early following his reckless behavior while in uniform, sources report.

Smithers was driving home after a long guard shift when he spotted a vehicle on the side of the road. In those next moments, Smithers made careless decisions, forever damaging the brand of the Corps, and tarnishing what his superiors called an otherwise “okayish” career.

“He was a ‘terminal lance,’ as we like to say,” according the prosecuting JAG, Marine Corps Capt. Monty Burns. “These kids act like high school seniors, thinking they own the place. Violating every rule in the books. This one, Smithers, got out of his vehicle in a civilian environment while wearing his camouflage uniform in an “emergency” that was determined after the fact to not be bonafide.”