THE PENTAGON — Multiple sources confirmed there would be temporary cease-fires at conflict zones around the world in what is being dubbed a "humanitarian" move to allow soldiers and rebel groups to get to a computer and view the massive trove of nude celebrity photos that leaked online Sunday.

The cease-fires between Israel and Gaza, Ukraine and Russia, and on the Korean peninsula and elsewhere are being hailed by activists as the first time prayers for world peace have finally been answered. Hopes for long-standing calm were soon dashed however, after ISIS militants resumed their fight against Syrian and Iraqi soldiers when they learned the leaked images had no goats among them.

In the image trove leaked online by the 4chan message board were explicit photographs and video of Jennifer Lawrence, Ariana Grande, Kate Upton, and others. Hackers hinted that more could circulate online soon, with a listing of not-yet-published photos including Kim Kardashian, Avril Lavigne, and Mary-Kate Ols…