Schrödinger's Specialist baffles philosophers and platoon sergeants alike

What is a sham but a perception?

Schrödinger's Specialist: Is this a regulation haircut or a refusal to cut hair at all?

FORT MEADE, Md. – In an unprecedented blend of quantum physics and shamtacular reality, a Specialist has become the subject of bafflement for both philosophers and warrant officers, alike. The enigma? Schrödinger's Specialist, a soldier who simultaneously exists and d…