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Veterans around country running to become next douchebag congressman

The usual suspects.

| 2 min read
Veterans around country running to become next douchebag congressman

AMERICA — With the nation moving into a critical midterm election year, veterans around the country are vying to become the next spineless piece of shit who will toe the line for their party leadership in Congress.

Campaigns across the country are promising voters more of the same old dog whistles and culture war bullshit, along with a heavy focus on fabricated issues of no consequence. But on some candidates’ websites, there’s more.

While ensuring they pander to their base, veteran candidates are also going the extra step to highlight their service and its relevance to how well they will let down anyone hoping for a functioning constitutional democracy in Washington.

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