Taliban sergeant major yells at new recruits for walking on his sand
Heads are going to roll.
By Cat Astronaut
KABUL — Outside a facility where the Taliban is training up its next generation of soldiers, Taliban Sgt. Maj. Habibullah Mubakzai was seen berating new recruits for walking on his sand.
“Ay there, freedom fighter! Get ‘chyer daggone filthy sandals off my sand!” Mubakzai screamed, as a number of terrified junior Taliban soldiers scampered to the sidewalk. “The supreme leader didn’t build all these pristine sidewalks just so yer nasty feet can soil my friggin’ dirt!”
While walking on the sand is technically not against Taliban policy, senior enlisted Taliban members are well known for “absolutely destroying” anyone who steps foot on their sand.
It’s unclear where this unofficial Taliban policy came from, but a number of senior Taliban noncommissioned officers have their own theories. Mubakzai says walking on the sand symbolizes taking shortcuts.
“There’s no shortcuts in the fight to destroy the infidel,” Mubakzai said. “If I let these limp dicks cut corners and walk on my s…
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