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USMC plan to 'kill ships from islands' frustrated by lance Cpl. Plan to 'kill shit right here'

PLA 'bout to get wrecked by 160 lbs of Monster, Copenhagen, and tattoos

| 2 min read
USMC plan to 'kill ships from islands' frustrated by lance Cpl. Plan to 'kill shit right here'
Hightower: “Hey kid, how badass would it be to jam this in a motherfucker’s face?”

OKINAWA, Japan - After years of internecine squabbling amongst active and retired general officers, Marine Corps leaders advocating for the revolutionary changes in the plan called Force Design 2030 emerged victorious. Opposition to the plan seemed to fall away once FD2030 champion and current Commandant of the Marine Corps, Gen. Eric Smith was confirmed following the retirement of creator Gen. David H. Berger. But FD2030 may have finally met an enemy who can do what a legion of retired generals could not. Senior Lance Cpl. Jake Hightower says he is, “[N]ot trying to kill some shit I can’t see, I’m’a kill some shit right here.”

Predicated on “long-range, unmanned systems that infiltrate the adversary’s weapon engagement zone; dispersed formations of manned and unmanned ships that challenge adversary targeting; and the adoption of disruptive technologies”, FD2030 revolutionizes how the Corps will fight China in the Pacific island chains and is supported by the Secretary of Defense and the US Congress. Hightower, currently on his second deployment to Camp Hansen, Okinawa as part of the Unit Deployment Program, is not sold.

“Check it out, fam. Sure, ‘stand-in forces to control maritime terrain, integrate with allies and partners, and play an out-sized role in competition‘ sound good to some old-ass general. But I’m all about beating down a motherfucker with another motherfucker, feel me?”, asked Hightower, an 0311 Infantry Rifleman and Squad Leader with a crippling addiction to Copenhagen and Monster energy drinks.

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