28
Stories filed
2022
Filing since
Filed by this bureauNewest first
20 Aug Pentagon Chimp hanging upside down from lectern named new Pentagon spokesman Banana tariffs, China, and showing his butt top agenda for new flack 3 min 13 Aug Navy & Marines Adm. McRaven hasn’t made his bed in years, sources say Sources say unmade bed had more loose ends than the Afghanistan withdrawal 4 min 6 Aug Army Fort Hood promises to keep murdering soldiers, despite name change Rebrand includes new signage, commemorative coins, and same culture of unanswered questions and haunted latrines. 2 min 1 Aug Navy & Marines Naval Academy summer program teaches kids how to be racist, tie knots Program blends soft skills, hard prejudice, and light tobacco use. 2 min 25 Jun Army US accidentally re-invades Iraq Troops surprised to find old combat outposts still smell like Axe body spray 3 min 20 Jun Navy & Marines Navy finishes retrofitting F/A-18s with periscopes, torpedoes After decades of dominating air superiority, Navy shifts focus to dominating water mediocrity. 2 min 16 Jun Navy & Marines After Israel attacks Iran, IndoPacom commander starts hiding missiles under bed “I’m not letting those goddamn CENTCOM punks steal from me again,” said Adm. Samuel Paparo. “Not this time. Not ever.” 1 min 14 Jun Veterans Trump declines parade march, citing sudden bone spur flare-up Insists he's ‘more injured than most heroes’ after learning parade route involves walking. 1 min 30 May Navy & Marines Neuralink placed in Marine crashes Pornhub "I saw it all. All of Pornhub at once. I was, like, the god of porn for a minute.” 2 min
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