SAN DIEGO — The commanding officer of Marine Corps Recruit Depot San Diego, Brig. Gen. Ryan Heritage, announced today that the Marine Corps is adding a new fifth phase to recruit
TWENTYNINE PALMS, Calif. — Pfc. Patrick Boyd is being hailed as a genius after finishing a four-year contract in just eight months. His peers are beyond jealous at Boyd's
FORT LEAVENWORTH, Kan. – Faculty and staff at the U.S. Army Command and General Staff College, known as CGSC, are celebrating the school’s debut appearance on the U.S.
RENTON, Wash. — The Navy is investigating a potential "sweet deal" to increase its fleet of P-8 aircraft, sources confirmed today. The Navy's P-8 Poseidon, an invaluable
PENTAGON — A Marine officer recently stirred up controversy by suggesting that Marines employ the use of LSD in current warfighting engagements and Pentagon officials are considering turning to the novel
PENTAGON — Air Force officials are sounding the alarm today about the greatest risk of the Trump administration's plan to use military construction money to build a border wall
KHOST, Afghanistan — A U.S. Army forward observer's bracket is "totally screwed" after only the first round, sources confirmed today. Bracketing is a common practice among
WASHINGTON — Members of the Pentagon Press Corps announced a $3 million GoFundMe campaign to raise money to find, locate, and recover missing senior Department of Defense officials by featuring their
Washington, D.C. — Newly promoted Col. Bob Dole has been immediately flagged as non-deployable following a review of his official personnel file, a spokesperson from Human Resources Command confirmed today.
WASHINGTON — Politicians celebrated after Congress voted today to lower the age a person can join the military, own a weapon, and drink thirty cans of Keystone Light before staggering to
ISENGARD, Middle-earth — Shortly after revealing that Palantir would be implementing the new Army intelligence system, the service announced a partnership today with stalwart ally and pillar of the intelligence community,
BAGRAM, Afghanistan — Fans of Afghanistan, already America’s longest running drama, are excited for the premier of the final season of the conflict, whenever that may be. A media darling
NEW MADRID, Mo. — Retired Lt. Gen. Donald Quixote urged the Pentagon not to underestimate the emerging new WMD threat — windmills of mass destruction, in a statement to reporters today. Quixote
FORT KNOX, Ky. — The Army has shifted strategy and is now focusing advertisements on the website Pornhub after missing their 2018 fiscal year recruiting goal by 6,500 recruits, sources
WASHINGTON — The Department of Veterans Affairs received high praise from a study commissioned by the pharmaceutical and alcohol industries published today. “The VA is doing an exceptional job providing just
NORFOLK, Va. — A veteran found himself in an predicament when it came time to pay for his traditional wing combo after a group lunch break at the local Buffalo Wild
QUANTICO, Va. — Headquarters Marine Corps will add wait training to the physical fitness test to reflect increased demands on the time of today’s Marines, sources confirmed today. The test
PENSACOLA, Fla. — After a gut-wrenching selection process, Ensign Pierce A. Stinkfeld was chosen as a student naval aviator, sources confirmed today. Stinkfeld, who graduated last year from the University of
The Marine Corps published a strategic document today that predicts future alcohol-related incidents will be caused primarily by near-peer pressure. "We need to think beyond the small-scale drinking incidents
FORT BRAGG, N.C. – The Army Criminal Investigation Division is investigating an Army officer's apparent disappearance into a visiting professor’s rectal area in a case of extreme
WASHINGTON — The Department of Veterans Affairs announced today that they would release a new white noise app to help veterans with insomnia go back to the last place they felt
QUANTICO, Va. — Brig. Gen. Arthur J. Pasagian, commander of Marine Corps Systems Command, announced today that all Joint Tactical Vehicles (JLTVs), the replacement for the Humvee, would be deadlined across
We’ve all been there — standing around formation, smoking, joking, putting your hands in your pockets, not realizing that you’re about to get called for urinalysis. Should you have
WASHINGTON — The Army has approved a new background option for portraits and DA photos, Sergeant Major of the Army Dan Dailey announced today. The background, officially titled “Background, Photographic, #88,
ALEXANDRIA, Va. — Chelsea Manning has come out as a heterosexual man and is asking President Donald Trump for clemency, sources confirmed today. Manning, who once orchestrated the largest intelligence breach
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