NORFOLK, Va. — In what would be a stunning break from over two centuries of Naval tradition, the U.S. Navy has revealed it is currently weighing the idea of “giving up the ship, just for like, a minute, just to see how it feels," sources confirmed today.
The Navy hasn’t seriously considered giving up the ship since Capt. James Lawrence issued the famous order with his dying breath aboard the USS Chesapeake in 1813, according to historians. Since that time, the Navy has strictly prohibited ship giving-up on any vessel, whether deployed or at port.
“Certainly, giving up the ship — even just once — would be an enormous break with tradition,” said Lt. Cmdr. Terry Adams. “For the last 200 years, every sailor has had ‘Don’t Give Up the Ship!’ drilled into them, as if it were a commandment handed down by God himself.”
