KUALA LUMPUR, MALAYSIA –The anti-American protests spreading throughout the Islamic world over an anti-Muslim film took a startling turn today when the Marine Security Detachment at the U.S. Embassy in Malaysia decided to burn down their own embassy.
"Wow, that movie was really offensive," sobbed Corporal John Webb from Stockton, California, after he smashed the windows of the gatehouse he normally guards. "We have to take a stand - a stand so loud and angry that no one will ever make something like this again!"
The detachment had recently attended a mandatory two-day culture class required for all Marines deploying to Muslim-majority countries, entitled "Islam: A Peaceably Peaceful Religion of Peace", sponsored by the Center for Advanced Operational Cultural Learning (CAOCL).
Following the class, the instructor showed the detachment the controversial movie trailer Innocence of Muslims, which has sparked massive protests and riots against U.S. embassies and consulates in Egypt, Libya, and Yemen.
"I figured that since they now understood the basic tenets of the Islamic faith, they could appreciate the gut rage that many Muslims felt on seeing this offensive video," said CAOCL instructor George Robinson.
Instead the Marines became agitated, first attacking the projector and film screen, then refusing to return to their posts until the United States government had formally disowned the film and arrested its producer.