RAMSTEIN, GERMANY — After a NATO defense ministers meeting in Ramstein, Germany, which was acrimonious at times, U.S. Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin announced a tentative military aid agreement with the German government aimed at breaking the logjam over providing Leopard tanks to Ukraine. According to Austin, the United States will deliver 100,000 military-grade signs with the text "not a tank" under the Defense Production Act. 

“We believe this will provide the Ukrainians with the main battle tanks they need and address German concerns about escalation without looking like a bunch of pansies,” Austin said.

For months, tensions among NATO allies have been high regarding the subject of providing Ukraine with tanks, and the German-manufactured Leopard 2 tank has been a particular point of contention. On the one hand, the Leopard 2 has been widely proliferated across Europe, with 13 nations possessing close to 2,000 Leopards, and thus is the only main battle tank platform that could be rapidly delivered to Ukraine in large quantities. On the other hand, officials in the German government have told Duffel Blog that German leaders are concerned about possible Russian retaliation against the country, as well as completely losing access to the Gazprom rubles they like to fill their bathtubs with.

“Look, we are not insensitive to the plight of the Ukrainians,” said one German official. “After all, we invaded them in 1941, so we know how horrible occupiers can be. But we have a real concern that donating tanks to Ukraine could cause Russia to take adverse action against us, so we really have to think this through.”