OAHU, HI — A sailor stationed at the Pearl Harbor naval base last night commemorated the anniversary of the attack that brought the US into World War II by downing 75 sake bombs, sources confirmed.

According to fellow sailors, Petty Officer 3rd Class Henry Quigg hatched the plan to take on enemies of his grandfathers' at a local bar at around 4:30pm on Monday afternoon, with a sacred vow to down 75 sake bombs and prove to the world that America "still take whatever the Japs can give 'em.'"

Sporting a t-shirt emblazoned with the words "Back to Back World War Champs," Quigg started the challenge with a handful of sake bombs while streaming the film "Pearl Harbor" on his phone. For at least the first hour, the sailor "shot down" a number of "sake Zeroes," eventually becoming an ace pilot that couldn't remember his name.