This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Top US Commander in Afghanistan keeps getting beaten by 'xxTAliBan_br0_69' in call of duty
BAGRAM AIRFIELD — The commander of US Forces Afghanistan has been unable to beat a fellow gamer named 'xxTAliBan_br0_69' in the video game series Call of Duty despite playing against him for years, sources confirmed today.
Gen. John Nicholson has been facing off against xxTAliBan_br0_69 online since at least the release of Call of Duty: Black Ops III in 2015, but even with the release of Infinite Warfare in 2016 he has yet to score a victory.
"xxTAliBan_br0_69 probably had his training funded by the US military or something, because he's just too good," Nicholson said as a sniper felled his character, “4starz_4lyfe.”
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