By Whiskey Fueled Tirade

EGLIN AIR FORCE BASE, Fla. — Billy Gunderson, a six-year-old Make-A-Wish Foundation participant, was just days away from graduating from the Army’s Ranger school when the cadre informed the youngster he was a “day-one recycle,” meaning that he would have to re-start the 61-day leadership school from the beginning.

“Rules are rules,” said Staff Sgt. Jesse Garner, a Ranger Instructor. “Students can only eat when we say they can and that little maggot was stuffing his face without permission. I don’t care if it’s a chocolate pound cake or the fucking handful of pills I caught him choking down after the final patrol.” 

“Besides, he’s never going to grow up to be a man if he can’t overcome a little adversity,” Garner added.

Billy’s parents say he told the Make-A-Wish foundation several months ago that all he ever wanted to be when he grew up was a Ranger. So when the foundation contacted the Ranger Training Brigade at Fort Benning, Georgia, the unit leadership was eage…