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Lt. Col. Sinclair's genie awaiting final wish

#479285059 / gettyimages.com

WASHINGTON, DC — A genie imprisoned by former 82nd Airborne deputy commander and champion hot dog eater Lt. Col. Jeffrey Sinclair has reported it is eagerly awaiting his master's third and final wish.

"My master, glorious sahib that he is, has used up two of his allotted three wishes," the genie said from inside the brass lamp where he was discovered several years ago. "I have provided the many women which he, peace and blessings be upon, sought to have carnal relations with, and then have convinced the military qadis to drop all the charges against him."

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